I came to plea my confession. Not of my confession that I am overly bound to you by love, but the confession of a love so deep that it hurts. A confession that I've never confessed to no other before. I'm drawn to a man I once knew. I'm drawn to this man that was once drawn to me too. I move through days in caution and slow pace, careful to not run into an alternative fore I know one day this man who I thought was you will soon make himself present in my presence. I confess that my everything was once yours and I confess that my travels flew far beyond the brim of the seas where the sun rises and sets. I confess that my body grew at war within itself on the simplest of days where no words were said... no fears to be had; only because the life form that I craved was made available to me.
Dear Lover, I gave myself to you! I confess that the temporary enjoyment this new man has deprived me of, deserves the most deceitful revenge. BUT, Lover, I can't do it. I confess that I dwell on the old love that was once new love and as fresh and sweet smelling as a rose. I confess that I continue to water this dieing scientific factor. I confess that I truely believe in your darkened and hardened petals, that life fomulates somewhere within. I confess that my anger is overpowered by your breath. I carry armor to battle an army but somehow the weapons you do not carry seems to defeat. I am no match. No match against the man that stands in between me and my love. My completion of a 360 degree angle remains complete welded by memory. Complete due to history. I yearn for dreams of fairytale happiness. I confess that I believe in the life after death.
Lover I confess!I confess that my begging shows me no shame and I remain confused as to why my pen writes so deeply for the hollowed soul walking amongst me. I'm at war with myself when I should be at war with the man who left me this way. I confess my wants to wear your heart on my sleeve. I should be at war with my once ultimate lover who left me this way. I confess that my commitment continues to be commited through some unknown off-balanced equilibrium malfunction. I confess that my Lover is my lover no more. Coming to grips with the deletion of what I stand for? I continue to battle with the man that stands in the way of who he use to be. The lover that once had a true love for me. I confess my eager heart diving in first. I confess that it stings as I try to snatch it back. Because the man I once knew still has a grip, tight hold and squeeze... 'til I'm left breathless and weak. There is no fighting off this new man you grew to be. But I continue to tear through cement block walls. And Lover, I gets nowhere..... I gets nowhere.
AND still, I kneal at my loves feet. He has to see me! I confessed to the new lover that my old lover's face is who I must see. Confess that my heart remains in critical condition because the weight of my old love has been placed upon me. I confess that I'm keeping it safe until ready to be used. Then I confess that I don't want the new you. I want my lover that loved me back so hard. Fallen victim of love battery and assault charges. The love that carried me through abnormal body pleasures and fulfilled dreams of what most women spend their lives searching for. I confess that I convinced myself that you would return. I confess that I look through the face of the man you came to be.. my old lover has to see me! I confess that I carry regret for not regreting the experience. And I confess that I am a repeat offender. I know that what I search for is still in there. New Love, you must step aside fore my Old Love awaits. I confess that I am ashamed of what you have become and even more ashamed of losing you. Confess that I feel like its my fault you have changed. I can't let my Lover down.
My Lover, I confess that I did what I thought I was suppose to. I confess that the sound of my name was like song and everytime you speak, "it's me you're looking for"... Dear Lover what do I do? I know I am losing you. I confess that, in reality, I've already lost you. Continuously lie to myself about you still being here. Making myself to believe you search for my love too. I confess that I know it's time to let go and that my endeavors of a love in a new physical form will be of no good use. I confess that my time here is done...
Me
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