Up 4 Discussion Presents...

Would You Want Me If I Worked At Burger King

I seriously doubt it, but I just wanted to see what you were going to say. Just imagine having those juicy charcoiled burgers brought home for dinner every night. Them apple pies and the hershey pie. Um Um Good!! LOL!!!

It's all about making the best of everything you already have, not dwelling on what we don't. The man working at Burger King could be just as suave as the CEO sitting on some empire. Either way you weigh them on the balance beams, nothing compares to being treated how one deserves to be treated. Burger King or not, I'll be all over my date like he's a star, lol!! What would you do?



How can you resist this offer?

 Hit up Up 4 Discussion to let me know.

Until next time bloggers...

Deeper Than Intimacy

LIFE


If the tea kettle fits, wear it.

Life is strange in so many ways. Yet it intrigues me to see the responses given off from the natural energy waves that seem to throttle throughout the different land elevations. I absolutely know exactly when I am in the wrong and I also know what paths to take to get to where I need to be. Hah! What a treat to know exactly what there is to come with having great common sense. I grow up, I digress, I excel, I fail, and I start all over again only to look back and see that I am exactly where I want and need to be. God always has a plan. Who would have thunk it? Side eye glances and stink faces towards those that started the "eye war" first... and then I laugh. Because unlike them, I know what I am doing and am very freewilled at revealing my faults. That is, only if I want to. But, honestly, I like to play dumb. The reactions are so far-fetchingly funny and people will talk until they are blue in the face and will rather die from asphyxiation before they shut up. This is not to make any excuses for actions that are seemingly done with a lack of common sense. It's only to let you know that I see that you see me, and I like my performance just as much as you do. Like I'm really going to reveal the entire story. Here is where the rebellion sets in. I strive to make no one happy but my babies which means that any other thing considered to be "out of their the norm" that just so happens to be sickening to my audience, I'm probably going to continue to do just that. Only because I get a kick out of the false images people try to portray for everyone else. You can't tell me how to live my life if yours is constantly up in some fuckery. Pardon me for handing you your ass, lol.


RELATIONSHIPS AND LOVE


What are you running from?

Hell rasied arguements arise and I get arousal from not only the energy I draw up within myself, but the energy that I can pull from my opponent. What is this? We call it a fight, maybe even war. A brawl. A heated conversation about disappointments or a lack of effort, maybe? Love? Is this how we love one another? Consorting images that fit the projector screen of our imaginations. We want comfortability. A go-to. We need to know that there is someone out there (other than family, because they have no choice or maybe they do) that is not forced into standing in one location. In front of me. It's unconditional and no matter what he/she or I say, I can count on a permanent presence in my atmosphere. I'm not forcing someone to be here and I am being counted on in return. Careful steps to building something we want to be prosperous and worthwhile. Battling for something so unknown. You think you got it but you're still not so sure. Because you feel something, but everytime you feel some thing, it feels even more different than the time before, or that other time when... dot-dot-dot, or the last time when I thought... dot-dot-dot.... because... dot-dot-dot. But this time feels different or is it every time that feels different? Now I'm confused. But you stick with what you know and what you know is this energy (wherever it derives from)... it feels too damn good. I'm crazy! You're crazy! Everyone is crazy! How much or how long does it take for you to get to this classification? Because in this mixed up world with what is normal and what is not, what is justified and what is just flat out fucked up... nothing compares to when the calming sets in after the storm. The still. The fresh. The little particles of mist that decided to stay behind. I'm addicted to the crazy, this crazy... what do they call it? I think they call it love? Or maybe, just crazy. So I guess you are right... I have lost my everlasting mind LOL!!! Tell me something I don't know.

LUST

An urge so easily flaring up one's actions, emotions and/or every fear. An energy that made up for every whip, winding, loop and  curve. Damn! I want you. I love the way you chew your food... it makes me wanna... And I like the way you walk to your car... I just picture... Because when you do that little thing with your... you know... that thing you do in the mirror before we leave out (chuckles)... I would rather stay in. Because what I envision and the way I envision it, is something special to me.Personal and somewhat embaressing. A bit intensified and passionate. Because I find myself staring. I think I want to do things at the most inappropriate moment, in the most inappropriate way only because double negatives attract in some type of odd fashion. I like you dressed in your vulnerable. And I think about this more often than the average. Addicted, maybe? Not necessarily. But just the other day, when we were sitting trying to be adults, talking about bills and life and such, I only saw your fingertips caressing the total amount for my last months charges. Overdue. And when you mentioned that we were out of bread, I only recall you fitting between the middle of my last two slices. Then there was... some time ago when you yelled across the room, "I'm so sick and tired of fighting!!" and then something to the effect of being sarcastic...but it sounded more like, blah-blah-blah, because all I really heard was the moans and tussleing from us fighting in the bedroom or maybe right there in the kitchen, it was. A UFC match, locked up and intertwined in hell's bliss. Yoked up against the wall, helpless to being raped with ever so passionate thrusts where I fall victim to the lust that leaves me with this natural high of euphoria. And now I only want more. I need another fix so let's argue again until we've settled the score.

Until next time bloggers...

Life Goes On

The excitement dies and the comforting, but yet aggonizing "Congrats" still come at you like yesterday never happened. So what do you do? Do you smile and say "thank you" and just keep walking or do you turn around and look them dead in their faces as if they are stupider than the stupidest of them all. Don't you see I don't have a belly anymore? Guess they won't know unless you tell them. Realizing that there is something rather different about you, but naaahhhh, that can't be right. Must be a pregnancy thing. But the point is, if they were never so busy meddling in your business, that little piece of time frame would have never been so awkward. So when you congratulate me (now)... are you congratulating me on my successful pregnancy or are congratulating me on my successful miscarriage? You didn't even ask if I was carrying and I never, personally told you that I was carrying but yet you can ask me when do I find out if it is a boy or a girl. Really?! #getthefuckouttahere!!

So I can be stubborn, bitter, and downright bitchy. But if I felt the need to keep everyone aligned for my every breaking newsflash, then I would and if I don't, then that means DON'T give me your comments, questions or concerns. Why don't people get it? I'm not here to except pity, apologies, or sad faces. I'm only here to vent and half the time viewers/readers seem to miss the real points of my writing either way, but it's pointless to vent about that because I'm quite sure that once this word gets out, the expected is what I will be hearing over the next couple weeks or so. One thing I can say is, when something is unexpectedly taken away from you, whether it's been a day, a month or 10 weeks; your life seems to fall into a whole new game-level. Just a minute ago, I was coming up with names to continue my line of uniqueness and regality along with Superior (my son) and Blessing (my daughter). Just a minute ago, I was back in "mommy mode" thinking about what it would feel like to hold such a small human being again. Wondering if this will be another 4 pounder? Maybe smaller. Or will this one kick ass and reach a whopping 5? lol! The comforting smell of Johnson & Johnson baby powder and lotions. The excitement of everything new. The adrenaline rush that comes with being a "high risk" factor and still being able to conquer such miracles in the time of dier needs, literally. New editions and introductions. This is ......, your new brother, your new sister, your new grandchild, neice, nephew.... MY new son... MY new daughter... Welcome home?

I fight back the tears and become overwhelmed with mixed emotions. What am I crying for? We hadn't even gotten to the stages of movement, so what is there to miss? I knew he/she was in there. Am I saddened because I feel inadequate as a woman that I couldn't carry another baby? Or do I feel the embarassment from sharing with the world that I was on my way to building yet a new empire and failed? When you're in the moment of your "glow", expectancy becomes a responsibility for everyone else's fascination with pregnant women... the aftermath of miscarrying is when you realize that you just lost your job. You were fired without warning or reasoning, and you are left with continuing on with your life as if nothing ever happened. So what about the little tiny heartbeat that I saw beating so rapidly? It doesn't matter because people don't miss what they've never had; along with responses to the effect of it may have been for the better or it wasn't in God's plans. It was only implanted in me and my memory for reference. I didn't uphold my end of the bargain and therefore life goes on...

Until next time bloggers...

What Miracles Bring

My hormones are raging and I'm so chemically imbalanced that this could and probably should be a new case study for specialists. So I figured I would just knock you guys up for a split second so we can all share these lovely feelings together. I'll be your dam tour guide for fatness, food and funk in your first trimester.

First let's start off with extreme-ness... and I do mean everything! irritates the hell out of me. Here is where patience becomes a virtue and you began to understand how much of it you really have, only because you start losing it over the simplest of things. I'll give you an example; Me and IHOP was about to fight one night because they forgot about my pancakes (speaking of which, I would really love some right now) and they didn't realize substitutions are a no-go. For some reason, people think that when you ask for Sprite and they don't have it, they can simply substitute Sierra Mist as if I won't notice. Really?! Why, why, why would you do that? Just simply tell me you have Pepsi products and not Coke products, or vice versa so that I can choose accordingly; because when dealing with something that you originally never had your preggo-mind set on, it's like 20 times worst. I almost spit that substitution in the waiters face. Self control is not heard of when dealing with preggo taste buds... we taste every friggin thing, which means it's 10 times better or 20 times worst than ever before. When it comes to food, pregnant women instantly pick up these scavenger characteristics. They're on a man food-hunt for the best tasting food out there or either the food that will subside whatever cravings we have been having for so long. If a woman is able to subdue a craving, OMG, it's like a food-gasm *sigh* But always remember that no matter what, all requests must be honored..

I hate to gross people out not really but I'm about to shed a whole new light on this beautiful miracle that everyone think is so awesome. You know how you see those medicine commercials and then they shoot that line at the very end really fast about the side effects. Yeah, let's get to the fine print. I would absolutely love to be able to take a shit without having to practice a breathing technique. Yeah, I guess lamaze comes in handy for more than just helping to deliver a baby. Constipation starts from the very beginning and if you think that is something disgusting... Hell, we are just getting started! A fart can be deadly, literally. Preggo asses no longer have the muscles to lock and clinch tight when trying to hold one in, in public. I also highly suggest that you run for cover (yes from yourself and especially those in the line of fire) or invest in a gas mask. And this is only the first couple of weeks, or months. Trust me, everything gets worst with time.

Next, let's try talking about how it feels like someone titty punched you all day, everyday. Yes! painful for no friggin' reason whatsoever. And the swelling?! Your aeriolas can get so big that your tit will look like you have a bunch of nipples. So I'm exaggerating a little... lol! A preggo woman's mindframe is exaggerated, but not intentionally. But honestly, them jugs usually gain more weight than what's in your uterus. No exaggeration here. This part will really make women enjoy being apart of the itty bitty titty committee. I would love to be pregnant with no boobs, lol. Life would be so much easier.

Your hair grows 10 times faster than ever before. Good thing for what's on your head, bad thing for everywhere else. Your shaving routine is no longer at a decent pace of every 5 days to a week. Now you are shaving every 2 to 3 days, maybe everyday. And let's not fail to mention those that like to go brazilian (like me). Ok... let's try with an example. Take a basketball and hold it at your waste/tuck it in your shirt for a better effect. Now... hop in the shower and try to bend over (with baketball in tact) to mow your lawn. Are you out of breathe? Did you catch a cramp in one of your obliques? Feel like you need to throw up? Yep! We have, now, achieved the fat person's shaving routine. We will need to practice this daily, so get use to feeling like you're continuously putting yourself into the full nelson.

Walk from your living room to the bedroom and it should feel like you just ran a marathon. Everything makes you gag/dry heave including just talking about something gross. There is no such thing as resting or taking a nap, you just simply pass out chocolate wasted style. *shaking head* So unladylike. Pissing is a never ending task and the beginner stages of pregnancy can have you looking like you have been bingeing on beers for the past couple months. People are going to continuously stare trying to figure out if that is really a beer belly or should they ask when are you due. And once you tell them, they are all in shock like they are just so use to you simply being fat. Sexting now consist of what's on the menu for the 2 of you to eat together. Example...

Me: ummm bae, you know what I would love to get a taste of?

Him: what's that? :D (smiley face of excitement attached like I'm referring to him)

Me: I would love some of those shrimp scampi frittas from Olive Garden and an order of lobster cannelloni with shrimp and a side of chicken and gnocchi soup. Um bae, doesn't that sound good?

Him: oh... call in the order, I'll be there in a few

Yeah, this post is nothing like real life and I still kept it professional. lol. On to round two.

Until next time bloggers...

Another "Really?!" Moment

I know! I know! I have been M.I.A. and it's all for good reason... I think. Today I felt I was ready to share some of the shit that has been boggling my mind since my new findings that which you can learn more about here. Since that topic was already discussed over there, let's discuss, here, how my life decisions seem to effect everybody else. That leaves us with yet another "really?!" moment.

Let's be clear that I am not the one to keep secrets. Most of you already know that. I am an open book and would probably be a best-seller if I actually sit my ass down and put the work in like I should. But you see, regardless of whatever achievements, goals you may have reached, or anything considered to be accomplished, there is always someone somewhere close by that has a Ph.D. in passing judgement. People have been confused as to why I have completely shut down from the outside world, the inside world, etc... They expect me to automatically tell what's the new haps in my life, or voice my opinion on a situation that probably has absolutely nothing to do with me or my situation. Most of the time, I don't mind. I mean, I do have a blog that kinda-sorta captures my life experiences. I love giving my side-of-the-stories and voicing my non-judgemental viewpoints on certain situations. I believe everyone should channel their visuals in the same manor because I'm just awesome like that. I don't pretend to make out like I am the perfect person because I'm not exactly sure what perfect means. But what I do know is, if I don't decide to open my mouth about a certain situation, it's probably because it's none of your fucking business. Simply put. How else can I say it? I think that was nice enough and frankly, I don't give a fuck how anyone feels about it. Oops pardon my manors o_O

The day of my judgement has not yet arrived. And I am quite sure that once my time is here, it will be handled between my God and myself in private; because guess why? He doesn't care what you have to say or think and neither do I. Surprise!! lol! It seems that the older I get, the more I shun myself away from what I consider to be pure ignorance. Before you know it, I will be alone with a dog for a companion (since I hate cats) and I'm completely satisfied with that. You see, the last thing I need, want in my life and have never requested is another person asking me a question about what is going on with me only to relay it through the grapevines or to turn up their noses as if they are smelling their own ass... because if you ask me, whomever it is that we may be referencing just has to be full of shit.

I believe that people are nosey and make it their business to pass judgement on others because they have no real business of their own. And if  they do have any type of business, they need to find somewhere/someone else to point a finger at so that they don't have to point a finger at themselves. Maybe they are feeling inadequate and think that if they judge someone else, they won't feel as bad about whatever bullshit they laid in. It's so funny how people concern themselves with everything that isn't theirs or don't belong to them. It's funny how people get mad because I don't give a fuck about their thoughts on MY matters. I laugh in the face of these practicing imitators who try to justify reasonings for my existance, or the next persons. Who are you people?! Nevermind, scratch that because I honestly don't give a fuck. Oops, did it again, lol!

Really?!

Some days, you just have to stop in your tracks and ask, "really?!" Can some people really be that complicated? Or bored? Or lifeless? Who knows... who cares... I just felt like venting today.

Until next time bloggers... maybe the next post will contain a little more talent, lol!