If You're Not First, You're Last

I heard or maybe read somewhere that women love to use the line, "I'll do it myself." LMAO!!! I will be the first to admit it, it's true. I thought about it for a minute, processed it, evaluated myself and came up with the drive behind this bullet. So, it's really not all in vain. I'm taking up for my girls and we got it honestly! So you might want to look out because this bullet could become rather deadly.

First I want to start by saying that I understand that some of us ladies have taken this whole independence thing to a totally different level. We have those that are modest about it and those who like to showcase. We even have the ones that are shouting, "I'm independent!" and haven't worked, payed for, or even struggled for a damn thing. BUT, that's besides the point. The point is, IN MY OPINION(lol), along side of the independence, if there is a man around, there are things that shouldn't have to be wanted for, asked for, or even spoken of. It should be a given. Men should never take advantage of the fact that "she got it" because in reality, it really looks like he doesn't. My motto is, "if I have to ask twice, then I'm begging" and I don't beg. I also would like to confess that I am the friggin queen when it comes down to announcing what I shouldn't have to ask for and the fact that, I can do it myself. Yes! If you are a man, you may be thinking to yourself that I am the epitome of a true, self-made bitch. I'll take that. Call it/me what you may, but I need to let you know who looks like the bitch at the end of the day.

Let's talk about this "PROVIDER" person, the "MAN", the one in charge. When taking on such strong proverbial titles, you would think that there is or should never be a lack of anything from the necessities within a household (ex. tissue, groceries, taking out the trash) to relationship stability (ex. love, sex, emotional) to family ties (ex. outings, dinner at the table, vacations). You should be able to back it up. Showcase the fact that you have your house under control and home will always and forever be taken care of. Because, you are da man! (maybe that's just how I feel about my home, lol) But, in my long line of man-dysfunction history, I have found that men are becoming professionals in the Excuses and Cop-Out Industry. I'll admit... some of the things we, women, ask for can be a little "corney"... or maybe not. But what happens when we actually need you for real? I don't think my man would feel comfortable with knowing that not only did I do it myself, but JoJo from next door helped me, too. What did you want me to do? You wasn't moving fast enough. It was something that had to be done and needed to be done at that given second. So what can I say? If you're not first, you're last. Not that this has anything to do with JoJo, but let me give you a scenario: we ask you to take out the trash, you do say what? "Ok bae, I'm going to get it after I finish watching the game." Game goes off and it's on to the next project that has absolutely nothing to do with the trash exiting my door. Do you see what you just did? I am, then, forced to say, "Don't worry about it, I'll do it myself." Did you see what just happened? Let's also take note that it's not just about the trash, it's about common sense too. Because if you see the trash overflowing, why don't you just go ahead and handle that? And this is where the domino effect begins, because now I am forced to follow up with, "I shouldn't have to ask."

Before you know it, after so many cop outs/pass ups/excuses, the realization comes into play that I'm Da mutha'fuckin' MAN!! and whose the bitch? Women like to ask their men to do things for them because it's cute, sometimes they don't feel like doing it because they do so much other shit that you don't do during the day, or maybe they just want to make their man feel like they are needed and they, in fact, are "THE MAN". Trust me when I say that a man is not a necessity, however, it is necessary to take out the trash. SO, regardless if the man is in place or not, the trash still gots to go. It's just a test, fellas. A small conversation peice. If you are not needed, then you are useless. And if you are useless, then you are not needed. Simple as that. So what happens next? The way things use to play out is the women would be screaming, "I need a man" and now times have changed and we're finding that it's really pointless to have one. Not because you're not needed or useless, but because we've already done it. Or maybe someone else did... hmmm...

Now this leads me into a totally different direction. I didn't want to go here. BUT, there are other people out here who actually do not mind helping out. It's definitely a bad look if someone else beats you to the punch, completing the job that should have been completed by you. Not only did you procrastinate and try to wait until the last minute (whatever minute that may be), but now someone else assumed your position and performed a job well done. I guess it would have been okay with you had I just done it myself like I said that I would do in the first place. And if someone else completed the task, now there is a whole other ball game to worry about. Now we are in a whole new arguement because YOU, did not complete a task that someone else completed other than me. But why even let it get that far? Why should I be forced to do it, when I intentionally asked you to do it. The quicker it would have gotten done... y'kno? Like at the very moment that I had asked, the quicker you could have gotten back to whatever it was that you were doing before I, so rudely interrupted you. I wouldn't be mad about having to do it myself and you wouldn't be mad about JoJo offering his assistance since he just so happened to be sitting there with nothing else to do. Then we wouldn't have to go back and forth, now, tossing the man's favorite line, "why didn't you just ask me to do it?" LMAO!!! Really!?!

Until next time bloggers... if you're not first, you're last!! Shake and Bake!!