The Dating Game

A friend came to me and asked me, "what happened to dating?" I thought that was funny. Being as though, I haven't been on a date in years. So, of course I put her on the stand. I asked, "what is a date? Or in better terms, what is dating to you?" She came with a long list of things that she wants but shouldn't have to ask for. It made sense. A lot of damn sense. But imagine how long it would take for you to find someone that actually gets it. So, my question is, what happened to dating? Is it really a game?

Everyone knows single women love to date and to be dated, they love to flirt and be flirted with. What woman doesn't?... the flirting part, I mean ;) I think it's built in with our other million and one characteristics. Anonymously searching for someone to complete the puzzle or fill in the blanks without us having to provide a cheat sheet. Someone with some damn common sense! In a nut shell, lol.

But... since we are dating, what happens after the "first date"? Honestly, the first date is like your first job interview. You gots to put on your game face and it has gots to be good! At least on your end while hoping and praying he came to play hard too. And this is where people get mixed up because you're on a mission while he's probably thinking about how many positions he can get you in, in a 5 minute time period. You see, here in the realms of Generation "Fucked Up", if the iniative is even taken once two people meet to even schedule a date, the occurences that might should happen during a date and afterwards starts to become a little fuzzy? Common sense tells us that the topic of sex is not a first date conversation to be had. Let me also incorporate that this could possibly be a reason for the "wack" sex that's being had more than often. No one is giving themselves time to work up an appetite or to feel the chemistry that could possibly be taking place. A woman's smile is not the gateway to her pussy. Seems that everyone is more interested in what the organs/insides look like and not the mind. And when the date comes to an end, do you sleep together? Get married? LOL! Oh yeah, I'm hella serious, too. You would be surprised how many people have began relationships after fucking on the first night they meet. I've even heard of people moving in together. New beginnings start feeling like old flings and it usually turns out to be an unhappy home, assuming that you even made it that far. Going back to the crib to chill and have drinks is not a first date option. What's wrong with the bar? And why would you even want me to see your place so soon? You don't know me and for all you know I could be a crazy person. Hell! You could be a crazy person, lol

I have to admit that my friend is a rather creative lady, she is. LOL! She came up with a shit load of ideas that she felt like a date should entail other than the basic dinner and a movie. If she would have left it up to me, that's exactly what I would have came up with LOL!! I guess I think like a man from time to time, LLS! Anywho, she explained to me that she wondered what happened to the late night long talks like back in high school when you both knew you should have been asleep. She wondered why no one sends "Good Morning" texts or flowers. Why no one double date anymore or sit by lakes like the happy couples in the movies. No one is having fun. Going to the kid's fun zones and acting like the kids. Ride the go-carts or play Putt-Putt. Hit a tennis ball, laser tag, maybe? These were really good ideas because I haven't even taken out the time to do either of them besides sending the texts. That comes easy. So, viewing from my psychological peripheral vision, I do admit that having more freedom as we all grew up is partially to blame. No rules. No standards. No chaperones. We lose sight of what we stood for, then, and forget how to project those same standards, now.

What's wrong with us? No mind stimulation, make me wait, no excitement, surprises, nothing. You can call her old fashion but I feel where her fustration is coming from. Is the single life really that bad that once you meet someone, anyone for that matter, your juices immediately start flowing uncontrollably? It's almost as if no one has anything to talk about anymore. I mean... it's either that or everyone is just lazy. There is only one thing that plagues these emotionless puney brains of theirs and that's getting laid. And for the record, I'm talking about men and women now. Everyone wants to play and put in no work. No one has hobbies or small talents. Art, reading, writing, dancing done in their spare time? Where did it all go?

Now with all of this depressing news for the singles, what's Plan E-F-G because we are far pass Plan A? It's apparent that chivalry is dead! So now I have to put in my $0.02 about how to handle this situation if you are persistent about this dating game. So let's go over the plays: when on a date, suggest the things that you would like to do. While the guys have blatantly stabbed chilvary right in the groin, we ladies have to start thinking for oursleves and quit waiting around for someone to cater to us. It's ok to be dominant. You could simply go back to being submissive once the dating game is conquered. Men have lost respect for "the chase", so instead of feeling like they should already know what it is we are thinking (because they don't) then we should just be forward about whatever it is. Let's take the first initial date to get to know one another and, also, talk about what it is that you are looking for from a generalized standpoint. We don't want to scare anybody off. In my opinion, I don't think it would be too soon to have a conversation of this magnitude for the mere fact that, it's already clear as hell to us, no one has time for the games anymore. Either the chemistry is there or it isn't, simple as that. People fear failure even down to the dating scene. You wonder if they liked you. How did it go and why didn't it end on the note that you had hoped for (and I don't mean sex). Well let's not dwell on the irrelevant. Get over it. We just move on to a new Dating Play. If he calls to meet up again... you suggest the place. If he doesn't call and you would like to meet up, swallow your fucking pride and grow some temporary balls. Call his ass and say let's make plans or send a text to see how he's doing if that's a little too forward. You can always tell by the way someone answers the simplest of questions, whether they are interested or not. These are just to name a few of my pennies because my list could go on.

When all else fails, just date yourself. Shit! Why put up with the hassle of waiting around for someone else to come make you feel good? Clearly, you already know what you like, what makes you smile, and the whole nine. So do it! Do it to yourself!! LMAO!! I like how that came out. Send yourself flowers. Take yourself to a spa, to the movies, to dinner. You have to love yourself and truly be in love with you before you can invite another to complete whatever it is that you feel you are missing. There is no point in extra additives. Just be free and do you. Have fun... with yourself!

Until next time bloggers... I love me some me *hugs*