Where the line should be drawn: Friends vs. S/O

Straight to the point... let's dissect the situation. I love that word! When trying to compare these 2 positions, you can't really say who should be the most important team player. In my opinion, if you have gotten to a point with the S/O where everything between both lives are beginning to coincide, then I think it would be safe to start weighing your boundaries and options, in life. Things you use to do, people you see, the money you spend, everything. The option of whether or not you trust your friend before your S/O or vice versa. Whose say so counts the most? Or whose going to play the most important part in your decision making process when different life situations arise? Everyone serves a purpose, of course. But who would or should you choose first? And not that it matters who you would go to first BUT whose advice would be of more reverance, should I say?

Each person has played a significant amount of time span in the "middleman's" life. I'm quite sure that the friend has been around longer. But everyone is going to feel that they are important or probably more important than the next. So where do we draw the line? Because, in dealing with 2 or more people who are prying for your attention, this can be a rather testy situation and could possibly end on both counts of each opposing team. Not that they both weren't very healthy and fulfilling relationsips, but most people (in reality) loves to have their cake and eat it too. No one likes to choose. Especially when we are dealing with people who are near and dear to us without so much as a bloodline to connect the 2. And this is where I feel an even amount of boundary should be set for yourself and in between.

My Opinion on Friendships: Sure enough, our friends are very important people in our lives. Speaking on a true friend, this is the person that is usually around to help you stand when you can't stand anymore. That person is there to smile for you during your time of suffering and pain, to speak for you when you can't get your thoughts together, and to laugh for you when you are fed up to the point of no control. This person is your walking diary. You have shared your deepest, darkest secrets (maybe) with them. They have been there for every event and occasion arranged and you people together are like the sisters/brothers that you have never had. It's a beautiful thing!

My Opinion on Relationships: Relationships come and go. We all know that no one is promised to you with or without paperwork or a ceremony. We all know that, in this generation, most people have lost the value of marriage and the real union that it represents. We also find that a lot of people in relationships don't consider their partners to be their best friends. Hmmmm... strange. We are absolutely sure of our friends and the purpose they serve but do we know why we want to be in a relationship with this person other than "they have good sex" or "they make me laugh" or "they're a good person"? Assuming we are on a much deeper level, relationship is great! Thoughts are shared, dreams are shared, love is shared, everyone is on the same page. It's a beautiful thing!

NOW: There comes a time in everyone's life where decisions have to be made. Things can become fuzzy, confusing and we look outside of ourselves for help. Certain opinions given by certain people really do count in certain situations. Life wasn't made to be simple. Everything takes much needed thought and processing. But, in all, most things aren't as complicated as they may seem. If you choose to spend your life with someone, boundaries have to be set for friends. Boundaries have to be set for yourself! What is created in the bond between you and your S/O should not be contaminated with the debris of outside affiliates. That does not mean that friends should be shunned. It only means that you are growing up and it's high time to make decisions without the extras who will never be effected by your life decisions. When dealing with situations such as this, S/O comes out on top.

BUT: Now that we are making life decisions and excepting the important factors that play a significant role, that does not mean the ball is in S/O's court. There must be a balance. An equal amount of progress within the 2 bonds. S/O has to understand that their may be some things outside of the relationship that has absolutely nothing to do with them or they may not understand whatever it is that their partner may be going through. So who do you call? You call on your friend. Now I feel strongly about the fact that your spouse should be your best friend and I've always longed for a friendhip with my future spouse. BUT, this isn't about me and under totally different circumstances. Maybe we haven't reached that point yet. SO, our friends still serve the purpose that they have always served. No position lost here and your friends still whole down the fort.

AND IN THE END: "Middleman" needs to handle each situation with a significant amount of care and responsibility. It is not and never has been a situation that should be ignored. Everything does not fall into place on it's own. Everything won't work out just because you hoped that it would. If you ignore it, it will not go away. Reassurance is needed at all ends of each stick. If "middleman" can't juggle the 2, then it's simple... you only need one. In cases like this, yes someone's feelings are bound to be hurt but they will be hurt even more while you are stuck in the middle of a battle between 2 people who are near and dear. I'll also assume that you wouldn't want to lose either of the 2. Take note and honor the fact that your partner needs you in specific areas while also honoring the fact that your friends should and are capable of understanding what your title witholds. Honor the fact that your friends need you there for them too, and learn how to balance. Indeed everyone has a life outside of a life. Everything needs to mesh because if it doesn't, it turns into shit.

Until next time bloggers...

Bougie Bloggers

LMAO!!! @ myself. I swear, I have yet to gain a real audience from blogging. I love to write. I love to voice my opinion (not that it actually matters how I feel about your situation) It's fun though! This is my diary.

So, only a few months ago, I began my blogging. Stepped into a whole new line of work and I know absolutely no one that blogs and nothing about it other than it's freedom to write whatever, whenever. I had to come up with a way to learn the ropes. Of course, the best way to find out answers is to ask and so I did. I figured the connections I would make trying to find out how this whole new community work would help to build me a small rep in this field. And let me clarify: not a job, not a side hussle, just love. I went on dot-dot-dot, played around up there to see if I could get some answers. LMAO!! Well, lemme tell you... I'm going to assume that appearance is everything. I'll state later about my reasons why. Anywho, I got a response from one person who told me to explore the blog communities, find what you like, read, follow and comment. Indeed I have been taking the man's advice. I'm going to say that it would be great advice, if I felt like the communities were responding back due to the love of the art being provided by these amateur and professional writers and not due to how much gain has been accredited by one person since their journey in blogging.

Like all occupations/reputations/hobbies, you have to build your name. That's not a problem. These things also take time. That's not the problem. But what I believe the situation here is, newcomers have to be beat into the game. It's easier to send and receive friend request on FB and to follow and be followed on Twitter, and you ain't talking about shit (had to get a little ghetto right there, lol). Here, it's like different high schools in different parts of the same town. The schools on the upper east side don't talk to the ones on the west side and everyone is known for their over-achievements of success and progress, goals to be accomplished in the future and the ones that are complete. I thought we were all in this together? ooo, sorry my mistake. I haven't climaxed to where you feel I need to be. I thought that this was a different and unique art form that is slowly making it's way to the public eye. Not a cluster of different social circles or the side of town where the writers have no degrees verses the writers who have Ph.Ds. Really?!

Now let's flashback to my comment that appearance is everything. I was already well into a couple posts when I signed up for dot-dot-dot, more blogger sites, and so forth... exploring my options. My point is, I never received an answer until I posted a picture. My question is, would I have ever gotten an answer if I had not posted a picture or if I wasn't as appealing. I won't say ugly, because what some may think is ugly, others may find pretty. Off subject.

But, anyways... I continue to strive for acknowledgement. Maybe I would gain more recognition if I had a Facebook page or Twitter, however, I choose not to give those social sites the pleasure for my personal reasons. Maybe if I had more friends in my social circle, that would help out a lot too. LOL!! So much for choosing not to know people. Or maybe, just maybe I could gain some feedback after my name goes plastered on someone's billboard or business card or blogroll or magazine or newspaper, lol. Guess it doesn't take much for true followers. The only way you can gain the right to be of relevance is if someone else with a small amount of dick size says it's ok. Then everyone else follows the leader.

All of this for my love of words. The art form. How one person can build a firm foundation and structure with no materials... just words. How someone can project a sound that can draw a person in under the assurance that everything will be ok, or that everything is not ok. The whirlwinds of emotions! To describe how one feels. To describe the way something looks. The insides, the outsides, and in betweens. New words, old words, foreign words. It's almost as good as sex... to me. I love it!! I should have been an English major. Think I'll add that to my list of life goals (random).

I feel that everyone, at some point, started out at the bottom of the food chain. In the meantime, you can call me bottom-feeder. Of course you have to work your way up and gain your manhood and stand your ground. It's too many people in the world for there to be absolutely no one interested in what there is to be said by anyone. And of all those people, I feel like there are not enough readers including the bougie bloggers that sit at the top of the pyramid. So busy writing that you don't forget to read. You've reached your climax, lost the humbleness, and the love and passion for the amateurs who probably started along side of you. You can't write without reading. But that doesn't matter anymore because all that matters is you are being read. And it doesn't matter that all of your words just may be beginning to run together and sound repetitive. It doesn't matter that your "likes and/or dislikes" comments and google +1's matter more to each individual reader than those from others. People easily lose sight as to how they ended up doing what they love once the love turns into money or fame or just a big name on a computer screen.

The love is gone and it's just work. No love.

I guess that will be all for today bloggers... until next time, I'll be reading.

Drunken "luv u's" and texts

So the saying goes that "a drunk man is an honest man." *sigh* Bullshit! I mean , I do feel it could be true. But really, I'm not in the mood for the overly emotional all-of-a-sudden sensation of feelings just because of a little extra liquor in the BAC. I'm sorry that I'm turning into a bitch here lately, I'm kinda feeling myself though. I think the old me is about to poke back through. Today's lesson applies to everyone. Drunk dials, drunk text messages, drunk talks, drunk fucks, drunk asses, drunk people, drunk you, drunk me, what-the-fuck-ever. Honesty! Let's focus on that... on a more sober level.

Now let's begin. The drunken nights usually start out like so: Someone/the crew usually make plans to have a night out at the bar/club/party/wherever. "Participant" already has some sort of a guilty conscious that has been plaguing to begin with. With this being said, no attention is paid to any of this plaguing of the brain waves, it just lingers. Guilty conscious, you ask? Ahhh-hhaaaahhh!! Did you actually think that these drunken dials or text messages came out the blue, because they were really feeling something there. No darlings! These 3 a.m., after club phone calls/text messages hit because of that guilty conscious lingering long before they even washed their ass to get ready to go to wherever-ville.

Now... the guilt doesn't necessarily come from them doing something that they never had any business doing in the first place or maybe it did. Maybe they copped a feel at the club and realized that her ass wasn't as juicy as yours, or maybe they have to continuously convince themself that they love whoever because "temptation" has made it's way to their side of the dancefloor, whatever. The real guilt comes from the fact that somewhere between back then (the past) up until now (the present), they know that they have been lacking in certain areas (the art of relationships/love, selfishness, etc.). However these drunk dummies, instead of trying to fix the problem, would rather be lazy and do what the homies/girls say do. Dumb drunk is thinking and actually believing, "home will always be there." In most cases, that is true. In the other homes... that's where the smart people live.

Moving right along... once alchey sits down somewhere, usually in the backseat of the car on the way home (there is no way you could drive drunk AND text, we need some common sense somewhere), they get this "good" feeling that messaging would be extra sexy or place the phone call (if you got balls nowadays) and pour out their drunken thoughts as to how you make them feel. They just all of a sudden had this wonderful epiphany that they never really knew how much they "luv u" (and YES! the spelling makes a hell of a difference!!) until now and they want to get married spend the rest of their life with you. LOL! Note the difference between the two: marriage... spend life... They are NOT the same things!! Also note: I love you... luv u... WTF is that?!! I don't buy it. No explanation needed.

Uuugghh... 3 o clock in the morning?! You make me sick!! And I know that you are the drunk one but I would be more than happy to puke for you! Only because I can smell the shit you are texting through the phone.

Before technology became so advanced, before the smart phone, before all of these apps, before texting even... these dumb ass motha-feenies would have to place that phone call. They would pick up the phone and dial the number through the double or triple vision that they, no doubt, have developed in the past 3-4 hours of club time concurred. A drunken phone call is worse. You can't just look at the phone and roll over. Or, maybe you could, but me, personally can't stand a ringing phone at 3 in the morning. I don't care what ringtone it is or how much I like the song or the person calling. The bitch is going to keep ringing and ringing. smh. BUT... now, thanks to Neil Papworth, (who happened to be doing nothing one day but trying to tell everyone Merry Christmas) we have texts. Good idea! Now people can hide behind a phone, express how they feel and not have to look you eye to eye until everything is laid out across the screen. Also, a plus side to the genious idea of merely sending a quick message, you don't have to look like such an ass right then and there at that very moment! This is great! Now you have time to think about what your drunk ass just text and how you are going to snatch it back if it wasn't to your liking. You may have even sent it to the wrong person wit'cha drunk ass!! The receiver may not get your message until they wake up (normal morning wake-up time). And thus we are able to look like an ass later OR, in worst situations, had time to map out a lie as to why this text was sent to the wrong person.

NOoooWW... let's hit a nerve with this one. The receiver can possibly be just as much of a dummie as the texter is. If you love Boo, too, then I guess that's so sweet. You may like the drunken text messages because your ass is probably drunk too. But let's still justify why you are still the stupid in stupidity. You can look at it 1 of 2 ways: this bullshit is really sweet... or you can try and read under a more psychological level of the situation and coincide the "drunkie being honest" with whatever text "bullshit" was sent: ie. "oh he really loves me because a drunk man is an honest man"... (X_x) <<< and this is me LOL!!!. Either way, you're still a fucking do-do brain if you are reeled in by the whole fucked up ass scenario because you're not examining things with a higher level of common sense.

Let me give you my views behind it. Believe me when I say that I can sum this up in a nut shell really really quick. If he/she has to get drunk to tell you how they feel about you on top of incorrect spelling and not including the pronoun "I" which includes oneself, then they have issues and so do you for believing them. Lacking the proper spelling of the word "love" is very elementary as well as murder to the meaning of the word as a whole. Not including the possesive word that commits you to owning up to your true feelings behind the phrase is just unexceptable. I don't deny the fact that they may be telling the truth. I probably believe them 100%. BUT... this is almost as bad as getting drunk just to fuck somebody. Sure enough fucking under the influence can be great given the right amount of alcohol and the right person, however it shouldn't take alcohol in order for someone to begin to appeal to you. A mixture of this "bullshit" juice mixed with some technology is a relationship headed for disaster. smh... Geez Louise!! Oh, "let's have drinks and talk because then I can really loosen up and get off my chest what I have been holding back for so long". Omg! Please people, I am allergic to stupidity and just plan ol' bullshit, period. Is this really what the world has to offer? As if we don't meet a bunch of idiots on a day to day basis, now we have to adjust to the new day and age idiot-ism and settle for bullshit "luv u's" under the influence through text messages?

I think that will be all for today bloggers... Il txt u l8a...

Gay is the New Straight: The Sequel to Banned from the Gates for Love

You can't see Part 2 without seeing Part 1, so if you need to take a minute to jump back one, I'll be more than happy to wait ;).

So now that we have gotten all prayed up and became one with our gay-ness, let's try and disect what we thought was the problem. Stepping into a new line of light can be really intimidating on top of knowing the history there is to know about one's sexuality that is not considered to be "of the norm". My thoughts on that matter is, "who gives a fuck what you think." LOL!! But that's just me and I know that everyone can't become one with the "fuck-it" attitude that I can get at the drop of a dime. So I'm going to do my best to help you out.

No. I'm not gay. Or am I?! OMG!!! I'm too funny!! That's besides the point. I won't stress my time-line to you in order to prove why I have just as much gay pride as the next gay person, but I will share my views on why you should do you if you are overthinking a situation that really needs no thought (and that's coming from me of all people) It is now time to quit hiding behind the image everyone else wants you to be, and become what YOU want to be. FLAMING-ly Fag-ulous!! LOL!!!

My thing is, why oppose or play defense to the shit that makes you feel oh-so good?!! I don't support gay/lesbian/transgender relations because I have kissed a girl (or maybe more)... I support them because I believe that these people represent far more than "fucking outside the box". I've also seen some of the most prettiest men ever! (which is probably kind of shallow, lol) Just face it, these people truely show individuality. Are you sacrificing the feeling of fun, mutual love (because your partner is the same sex as you are) to be in a heterosexual relationship that's nowhere near the spectaculars of what you feel with the same sex (only because that's the way everyone wants to view you)? People make such big deals out of things other people are doing and have not one motive behind it. One things about it... how can it have such an effect on others when they don't have to face you or "it"? What's it to you, if it makes you happy? Are you here to please everyone else or yourself? You're not the President! And, in my opinion, I think it was ok for Bill to get his dick sucked. So what! Hilary should have been doing it like a good wife should.

If it is an image that most are worried about, I think that homosexuality is beginning to come abroad the same way women did, the same way blacks did. Hell! the same way Obama did! Our first semi-black President. Jumping off subject, I believe that this grip the "States" called themselves having on the people, is finally loosening up. People will never accept the things that they cannot understand or the things that they have never been exposed to. Honestly you can't blame them for their ignorance. I guess we all have to have some rules to an extent, but rules behind who you can and cannot love is just ridiculous. Oh yeah, and stupid. We are unstoppable! Free to express, to speak or love and fuck ;) whoever we like! Be it man, woman or both. "And always remember class, safe sex is the best sex!" *in my sexy teacher's voice* LLS!! Too funny!

On a more serious note, since we tried it before knocking it and actually liked it, I think those who are having trouble dealing with the issue of their sexuality should try their damned-est to find the comfortability in their skin. Have I endured the stares behind PDA? Of course! and you wouldn't believe with who? A man!! :O oh my, really?! People pass judgement all day long on everyone that they know absolutely nothing about or maybe they know everything. What difference does it make? We all have different hobbies we know and love. Who knew that God was excepting volunteers for judging rights?

Anyway... for those that want to talk shit, let them. Guess whose getting the best-est most mind-blowing, gay sex ever?! You are! And what do the "talkers" have? NOTHING?! A life of "no life" and a dry coont or a stale dick. Maybe it's not the people. Maybe you feel that it has a lot to do with your faith and relationship with God. Well... huuuunnneeeyyy, I'm here to tell ya, God loves ya just the way you are. *in my best country voice* He's the one that made you!! Live life to the fullest and make smart and wise decisions. You only get one chance and who knows how long that will be. I honestly do not believe that anyone will be condemned due to the fact they love someone that just so happens to look like them. In my opinion, I would rather live my life loving the people that loves me back just as much as I love them. If that means cherishing ass and titties x2 (mine and hers), then so be it. The more, the merrier lol;) We'll have a bouncing good time!

Until next time bloggers... be gay!!

The Shelf Bitch

This is a damn good preventative method to keep any female down. A way to keep her from everything that she really wants in a man (of her own) and for the family that she already has or hopes to create. Recognizing the fact that this is what you are is the hard part and even harder to except. A lot of women could even get this confused as being the "down ass bitch". Let's contrast the 2, "down ass bitch" can also be seen in situations like baby-momma drama, or just a random hood bitch that really loves this guy and he probably loves her but she got a lot bit of craziness in her. Too much crazy to settle down with but he knows he can always count on his baby-momma... smh. The "down ass bitch" is the real do-do brains because they actually know and keep up with what the man is doing and put themselves on their very own pedestool: Down ass bitch talking, "That's just some dirty hoe! Whatever! He comes home to me every night." LMAO!! Sike boo boo! Yours and everybody elses. He just spends the rest of his night with you. I thought long and hard about myself as well as other females around me (which are very few), however it seems that this title has a big place in the heart of dummies relationships.

First off, let me give you the run down of "the shelf bitch". This bitch is the shit!! This bitch is bad! She looks good. She smells good and can hold her own. She is the best well-rounded female a man could ever come into contact with. Wifey material. She does everything that your average independent woman does and won't ask for a thing. This is usually the woman that guys won't holla at but will question her why she isn't married yet and what he would do if given the chance. She doesn't hesitate to announce that she is single, however she kindly gives off a reserved impression that she's really not available. Poor things. These women usually fall in this category after long-lived relationships, the birth of the baby, just a friends that turned into friends with benefits, and probably some others that I have not listed here. Moving on... this scenario usually comes into play because the man is not ready for the real responsibilities that comes with being a real adult. Maybe it's not that he can't handle the responsibilities but he would rather not be attached or joined at the hip while doing so. She grows up, looking for love and he grows apart, looking for his boys and video games. SO, instead of going headstrong into the last couple of stages of adulthood, he nice and neatly places the "love of his life" on display as the trophy. Give her whatever she wants and whatever she needs as long as he can continue to play.

So let's talk about these sorry-ass-no-good men that place these women on the shelves. Ok, they may be alrite while on the clock. But these motha-feenies have issues. Scared to grow up. They know they could (or do) have a good woman by their side that could be that much needed backbone (that most men need), but they want to "live their lives" or "not be held down" (I guess this is what the women prevent). smh... They give this woman just enough act-right (which really ain't shit) to keep her appetite content and her mouth closed. Of course he sees the potential that this woman contains and that's the reason he keeps her at arm's reach. That is, only if she allows him to, which most shelf women do. If he needs her to be by his side at a specific event, she's going to be there. If he needs her to fix his meal, she's going to do it. If he needs an ego booster to be held and rubbed on, she is always ready and available with no prior commitments and no questions ask. Like I said, this is the perfect wife material. KEYWORD: material.

Ok. Class is over and the definitions are out the way, so let's look more closely into this situation here. Shelf bitches aren't man-made. Most men think that they (meaning themselves) withold something that she really likes, wants or needs. That's definitely not the case at all. Truth be told, shelf bitch doesn't like drama and she settles for less feeling that in due time, it will turn into more. Not to mention, she has lots and lots of patience. The truth also tells us that there really isn't anything that is making her stay put on her dusty little shelf because whatever it is that this "winner" has, she can honestly find it somewhere else. She knows this. All of it. But, she's lazy and doesn't feel like searching or playing the field. She feels there is no need to fuck around or even began to put herself through the horrors of dating because it's just too much headache putting up with new attitudes and, worst of all, new bullshit. She could possibly be thinking that maybe one day he will grow up and see the light and come with the wedding ring that she had always hoped for or maybe just a real relationship, period. OR... she probably already knows that it will never be nothing and she'll just play in the sandbox with him until somebody better comes along. Soooo... "winner with the trophy", truth be told once again, you really ain't shit. She's only still sitting there because no other "real" man has came and swept her off her feet on top of the fact that most women on their grown woman status don't make time for boy toys they barely know. LOL!

Ladies, if you are feeling like this could be you, then that is ok. Most shelf bitches are sometimes undecided about what it is that they really want. At some point, you have to be ready and willing to put your foot down and just live the complete single life without hassle OR the wait. If you really want to get down and dirty, we can discuss what the damn trophy winner is doing besides dusting off his most prized posession at his convenience. You have to give it to him, this player really knows how to play the game while you are on looking quite fetching in his display case. Although you are the only one that is holding it down in the armoir, he's out flaunting his winnings. He's probably clubbing, chit-chattin it up with the groupies, or maybe even fucking one or two of them. He's admired because his crew knows that he has a prize piece at her home where he is free to come and go as he pleases. He doesn't live there, so he's not required to come in at a decent hour or to even come in at all. Now that there are no ties due to whatever situation got the 2 of you here in the first place, he's gained quite a bit of stability which means that he can keep and promote his well-known reputation as well as perform his manly duties when it comes down to helping you pay bills, assisting with your handyman needs, hitting you off with some dick or whatever you may call on him for. He's most definitely going to be there at the drop of a dime. It may take him some time. But that's only because he got to beat the other bitches off who he doesn't give a flip about (let the down ass bitch tell it).

Guess your ego could feel a little full knowing you have some smidget of control over the situation but only to an extent because it is against the rules for you to do you at your own given will. Shelf bitch has to choose her spot. She has to maintain her spot. Cater to him and only him. No fun for you. No numbers for you. Just him. Either you are on the shelf or you get sent back to the manufacturer to be re-titled for the next winner. He may put up a fight but it won't be until well down the line after you find another man that is 10x's better than he is/was. However in the meantime, your ass is just here to sit pretty on his top shelf. Well out of reach of sneaky admirers and sticky fingers.

With all this being said, I suggest you find out where you fit in. I guess it's safe to say that you aren't chasing after him. That may help you feel a little better. But I don't know which one is worse, chasing after him or waiting around while he soil his royal oats. lol.. The ultimate word for any woman that plays second fiddle to any one/thing is queen of boo-boo-da-fool. And ladies, we have all been there and some of us are still there. It's only right to play the shelf bitch at least once in your life. LOL!! It may feel good from time to time to have a man damn near kissing your ass, but we all know the truth. And if you you didn't, you know now. If you like your spot in his armoir, then keep it. Make sure you stay stocked up on your can of Pledge. If the shelf is NOT the spot for you, then I suggest you take a big leap and walk away from it.

Until next time bloggers...

Banned from the Gates for Love: Homosexuality

People, places, things in this world were all given a name. By who? Morals were placed upon us. For what reason AND by who? Churches were put here and laws were made. Who put them in charge? Ask yourselves people, do we really have a mind of our own OR is what we think, really what "society" or this busted ass company we call "government" has driven into our heads? This can be a touchy subject here. And to be clear about my views, I don't approve of or disapprove of what people do. That is God's job, not mine. I pass judgement on no one.

Referral to the Bible for backup can go a long way even if the person referring doesn't rule out to be the holiest of Christians. These people claim to know, most definite, what has been recited in the Bible even though they have not read or researched any of it. Somehow, though, they can tell you exactly what is right and what is wrong (because they just know). Really?!! Well, I'm going to tell you what I read.

First off, some of us may or may not go to church. Some are committed to their congregation, some are somewhat and some may not even be apart of a congregation. Either way, we go to hear one person speak on something that they feel they have studied and mastered. I mind you, most do not obtain a college degree for this either. In all honesty, besides Shakesphere, in my opinion, the Bible is one of thee hardest books to just simply read and understand without having to go dig up a dictionary or even a book that can translate a specific language. With that being said, the Pastor's job usually consists of picking Scriptures to study and to relay the message to the congregation Sunday morning or Bible Study (whatever suits you). Note that this is their own descriptive definition behind what that particular Scripture means to them. It could have a totally different meaning to another Pastor. In most cases, they may be right. In other cases, they may be way off of the trail they are suppose to be on. Who knows! What really counts is the faith that YOU have within yourself for the God that you worship.

Down to business:
"The Bible has been misused to defend bloody crusades.... to support slavery, segregation, persecute Jews, support Hitler, to condemn interracial marriage, execute women as witches, and support of the Klu Klux Klan." -www.soulforce.org

My God promoted this? Seriously?! It doesn't sound right, does it? Would you stand for any of this? Do you agree? If you do not believe that these are the things that God stand for, then how can you pass judgement? And nope!! You cannot pick and choose which ones you like and which ones you do not like. You have to be all or nothing, right?

So... our society wants to use the Bible against homosexual relationships. Be clear that we are talking about a Book about God and not relationships. So this is not a source that you should go to, if you are confused as to what positions and with whom. From what I have studied over these past few days, is that same sex relations have only been "spoken of within the past 150 years". Technically, that means that the word homosexual or gay is not even mentioned in the Bible on top of there is no Hebrew or Greek word for either. If you find it in your Bible, then you definitely purchased yours from the wrong book store and that book store went through the wrong manufacturer. There has been questions of specific scriptures which may tackle the subject such as Leviticus 18:6 and 20:13. And like others, we may be misinterpreting this as well. We all know what it says on the outside surface, BUT, who really knows what it means? The person who they say wrote the Bible is not here to defend himself and I don't know of anyone who knows of his next of kin that would be able to translate. Even if it did mean what we think it means, it refers to homosexual men and not women. Strange....

Now if we really want to dig deep as to some of the things that have been considered an "abomination", then we can refer to Leviticus' "holiness codes". Codes that say:

* "If the bride is not a virgin, she must be executed by stoning"

* "If a married person has sex with someone else's husband/wife, the adulterers must be stoned"

* "Divorce is strictly forbidden, as well as remarriage to anyone who has been"

* "Married couples cannot have intercourse during the time of a woman's period or... execution"

* Polygamy is exceptable

* Slavery is exceptable

* It is considered murder if men have spilled semen

* OH!! and this is the good one, it's ok to have hoes on your team

So on and so on... So you tell me, how many of you have already committed any one of these acts of sin? Do you agree that you should be stoned because you are divorced? Do you agree that you were a virgin at the time that you were married? Are you willing to be a hoe or 1 of many wives sharing one man? And guys? how many murders have you all committed by "pulling out"? LOL!! oh yeah, I'm serious! Abortion is a sin! Birth Control is a sin! Tattoos. Sin!! Working on Sunday. SIN!!! My all time favorite... "playing with the skin of a pig" (football). SIN!!!

So for the sum up... let's not get ahead of ourselves here. Of course it is up to you to believe who and whatever you would like to believe. Your beliefs are your beliefs. But one thing I know for certain is you contain a lack of common sense to promote something you do not fully understand or have not researched for yourself. Truth be told, there is really not much I can say about the whole situation at hand because at the end of the day, regardless of anything that whoever feels is wrong or right, their say does not matter and neither does mine. If you want something to believe that makes sense just as clear as day, Romans clearly says, "Therefore, you have no excuse, whoever you are, when you judge others; for passing judgment on another you condemn yourself...". Am I the one to make the call? No! Like I have stressed before, love is love. You cannot help who and how you feel for someone. We all know what is considered to be "natural". Everyone has heard the line "be fruitful and multiply" but those who choose not to have kids or can't have kids... are they being condemned? This is not a test of your faith, just a mere request for you to understand your motives for your actions before acting on them.

At the end of the day, we are all God's children and it was said that our sins have already been accounted for. God didn't put us here to be "know-it-alls". It is our duty to live righteous and to do no wrong but it looks to me that everyone is already doing wrong whether they believe it or not. *shrugs shoulders*

Until next bloggers... I support the Gays! Gay Pride!!

How common is common sense: Phase 2

Told you I would be back with Round 2!! Let's jump right into business.

This one has really got me up on my toes. You see... at this moment in my life, right now, I should be celebrating my independence. The fact that I have not had to ask, beg or kiss ass for anyone's help. I got my new place and I'm becoming one with my new found "single lady-ness" (I made that up). I found that my chump change I make at this place people tend to call a job, could actually be stretched and used to an advantage that I never knew it had. All By Myself!!! BUT, in the mist of these 6 months, I have had a little voice in my head. Usually comes through the speakers of my phone. LOL!! And I'm not venting to put anyone on blast, but this just goes to show that you should always listen to yourself, FIRST!!!

My relationship with cars suck!! I have never had a car for more than 5 years. Shit! I've never had a car for 5 years. Yes! If you have been reading, then you would have found out from my previous post that I am a mechanic. You would think, by now I would be like one of those old men with a collection of broken down cars in the backyard (only in the south LOL).

Anywho, my point is... I had this little tink-tink of a Buick. Had some tricks to it, in order to drive. You know the kind... kick the trunk, then run around the car 3 times, mash the gas then put it in drive LMAO!!! Or something like that. The little voice that continued to talk to me through my phone on almost a day-to-day basis convinced me to sell my car. My thoughts, "Hell naw!!, and then what?" Because, as if it wasn't bad enough having to start all over after this major break-up, I still have to get to work and take care of my children which means that I need my tink-tink. Not to mention, my mom's house is nowhere near city limits.

It took a good month or so for this convincing to work. Deal was: I sell my car, use that money to help get on my feet and "the voice" would buy me another car. OK... cool deal. So, with that being said, my road to independence has been harder than I thought it would be. Not that "the voice" didn't know the situation.

So BOOM! "Voice" gets the car! I'm excited! Had a few minor kinks in it to get out and I would be "on the road again". SIKE!!! smh

Now let's go down the list:

* First off, I'm in NC. "the voice" is in MD
* I have to get to MD to get the car
* I don't have a car in NC (duuhh)
* I work
* I have kids, one of which is in school so I can't just get up and go
* I'm on a tight budget

Alrite, game plan time: "Voice" would come to NC to get me to go back to MD to get the car. Alrite... cool deal. NOT!!! Made plans for 4 weekends straight to take this trip that never took place. Oh my!! Frustrated and tired of thinking. So... the final weekend, I am reassured that we are good and read to be sot on go only to find out it's a NO-GO once again. Geez!! Really?! No phone call, no kiss my ass, fuck it.. I'm not giving you the car, changed my mind... NOTHING!!!!

Moral of this story, I should have just stuck by my little tink-tink like I had intended on doing to begin with. Family or not, when you are grown as hell, you can not become dependent on anyone. You are only setting yourself up for heartbreak and misery. And truth be told, they can bring you down lower than you have ever been before. You see, when no one has to endure the trials that you are going through first hand, they will never begin to feel the stress and realizations as to why you handle things the way that you do. These are the reasons I'm stubborn and can really be a bitch about asking people for shit. It's not about pride, it's about I can do without the extras. No one is safe *in my Kevin Hart's voice*. Now that we are at the end of the ropes, fuck the damn car!!! It's not even about the car anymore and it never has been. The thought was nice. However, I could have kept getting my excercise in, in the mornings before work, trying to get the damn thing to crank. I was fine.

Now let's tap into where common sense comes into play. And I admit, BOTH people lacked common sense in this situation. Me and "the voice"! My lack of sense came when I gave into this wack ass idea. I should have known better. Something was telling me through all of the convincing, "no Candi, just keep doing what you have been doing. It will be okay." Instead I let the other "voice" overpower MY little voice in my head that keeps me on the right track. "The voice" common sense lacked full-blown in all aspects. DO NOT commit yourself to a project that you cannot complete. Come up with plans and bright ideas or deadlines that won't be met. Especially when you are a couple hundred miles away. You see, now that I became dependent on this gift that was promised to me, I still lack. My whole routine before and after work now has to be re-adjusted with the new place and someone elses ride, as it has been for the past couple of months now. I'm further in shit than I was with the tink-tink in which I was really content with. Un-be-fucking-leivable!!! What the fuck was I thinking?!! One thing's about it, you definitely learn from your mistakes. Never Again!!

Well bloggers, guess I'll be job hunting because I will definitely need another job to get my own damn car. Until mext time...